Friday, August 11, 2006

Feast or Famine in the Grand Scheme of Things

Have you ever noticed the universe likes to fuck with you?

For example: babies. Babies are born every day. Often there are more babies born around a full moon. BUT, in your personal life, babies will go in waves. (That is the royal "you", by the way. Because when I say "you" I mean, "Me, the princess.")

The first Baby Wave in my life happened about two years ago. People I knew from all over the U.S., cousins, friends, co-workers, all got knocked up about the same time. So I currently know an entire fleet of two-year-olds. And now it has happened again. I have a collection of very pregnant acquaintances. So the universe kicks in, with all it's ha-ha-sucka trickery. Because these babies will not necessarily be born on the same day, oh no, that would make remembering birthdays WAY too easy, but instead it will be a much more inconvenient "messing with." I have not one, not two, but THREE baby showers to attend on August 19th. I haven't been to a baby shower in years. And yet now there are three on the nineteenth of August, two thousand and six.

WTF?

One is in the mountains. One is in a smaller town in the smack-dab-middle of Colorado, and one is in Illinois. I had to politely decline the last one. (And will be pushing it to squeeze in the other two. But the second one will have COCKTAILS, it is a COCKTAIL BABY SHOWER, which is pretty much the most fantastic kind of baby shower I've ever heard of, so I will be making a concerted effort to get to that one on-time!)

Another example of the universe's fiendishness and important events colliding: over the same weekend in October, one of my all-time favorite bands (shout out to Flogging Molly) is having a concert, it is also my five year college reunion and all sorts of fabulous people are flying in to town to attend and create general mayhem and debauchery of only the most fantastic kind, and I will have to miss it all, because I'm going to be in Germany.

Germany!

I don't even speak DEUTCH. Ich is going to the Frankfurt Book Fair for work. Where ich (we have switched from the "royal we" to "half-assed German," now) would be excited to go, normally, except for missing all the aforementioned good times. Also, I hear Frankfurt's kind of the armpit of the country. Just because we're book dorks doesn't mean we wouldn't appreciate some nice, gingerbread-y architecture, folks.

I may say that in my comments sheet, on the checkout day.

So it's funny, to me, that the universe plays like that. Because it shows the universe is not organized. (Hello, Chaos Theory. How did you find my blog?) The universe could do very well with a day planner. But the universe and I have that in common. Being a fellow MESS, I can only hope that I remember to have a nice, stiff drink before I get on the plane to Frankfurt (I will cover my fear of flying in another entry- although that's a good story, involving drugs and drool) and also to remember to NOT bring said Stiff Drink onto the plane, seeing as how liquids of any kind are somewhat Frowned Upon these days. At the very least, I will raise a pint of good beer when I get there to all the babies being born while I'm away. Which is only to be expected, since the universe plays like that.

1 comment:

eric220 said...

IDK, I think you proved to opposite. Seems the universe is quite well organized and is, in fact, conspiring against you.