You know your day might be off to a bad start when you are having an AMAZING dream about a beautiful cake, which you are just about to sit down and eat, when The Funasaurus abruplty halts your reverie by shaking you awake all, “C'mon, baby! We've got to go for a run before it gets too light out!”
At that moment, I could see how some people consider divorce as an option.
I then proceeded to start whining, like the mature adult that I am, about how I was hun-gry for ca-ake, and how I really want just some ca-ake.
And The Funasaurus was all, “Dude, it's oh-butt-crack thirty A.M. I'm not really sure what you want me to do about it.”
Meanwhile, work has kept me very busy, which has been a huge impediment to my social calendar. I've also added a sixth bridesmaid to my damn wedding party (long story) so I'll basically have a mini-sorority standing up there with me on my special day. Despite the mounds of work piling up, I decided to go get the material for her dress at lunch time, yesterday. And since I was headed out that way, anyway, I decided to stop by the pet food store where we get our fancy pants hippie cat food.
Sadly, not only was the pet food store closed on Mondays, but so was the fabric store! So I wasted a perfectly good forty minutes that I should have spent working, driving around wasting gasoline in the blazing heat. I contemplated buying a Hummer on my way home, so that I could at least say I accomplished something on my otherwise completely useless and exhaust-creating trip.
Then we got to finish off the night by going to another pre-marital counseling where we were told a sexual relationship can be a tricky thing to navigate (no kidding, I mean, esp. when tied up...) and that our spiritual lives would be more fulfilled if we found Jesus. (The one on my key chain doesn't count?)
I am probably not earning extra bonus heaven points by writing this post, eh?
So now it's back to work, because I have a crap-ton to do before they send me to Orlando at the end of the week, because I work for the company that thought it would be a GOOD idea to have a convention in Orlando in August and NOT get anyone a pass to Disney World.
WTF, company?
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
12 comments:
Oh Princess, I love this. All of it.
Uhm, not to be all judgmental or anything, but your pre-marital counseling sounds like crap. And what I mean by this is it sounds more like it is more irrelevant, unsolicited advice that doesn't really fit you than the individualized (and thus relevant to you) mapping of things to be aware of for your future. Just sayin'. Of course, I am probably completely talking out of my ass, in which case, disregard!
Six bridesmaids?? Now my feelings are hurt. Want to go for seven? :)
A)My ex-husband kept adding groomsmen to his side, so I had to keep adding bridesmaids. Sign #5,000,000 the wedding should have never taken place!
B)And can't you use the excuse that you have to sample cakes to cure your cake craving? Mmmmm, cake. I love cake. I miss cake. I should make a cake.
C)And my hubby says if you need counseling, you shouldn't be married. But that's just his opinion. Is he at least like Robin Williams?
"where we were told a sexual relationship can be a tricky thing to navigate (no kidding, I mean, esp. when tied up...)"
Thanks, Princess. I just soaked my keyboard with the water I was drinking. I almost choked! Too funny...
I'm the maid of honour in an upcoming wedding where the bride is having a bit of difficulty finding another bridesmaid. I said that if I get an extra gift, I'll walk down the aisle, then run up the side and walk down again. But the extra gift makes or breaks this deal. hahaha....
No pass to Disney World???? How awful!!! I LOVE Disney World!
I can feel as blue as can be and miserable and mad and generally out of sorts and come here to read and after having laughed and hooted and chortled and chuckled my way through whatever day you've had I feel SO much better I just had to create a run-on sentence to tell you so and say thanks :)
Isn't it bizarre how those premarital counseling things turn a bit into recruitment drives? Luckily we have a close friend of the family as our officiant, so it hasn't been to full on, but he still drops little hints from time to time about how we would really benefit from a "church family".
And six bridesmaids is acceptable, but NO MORE, okay? It's kind of like chocolate--you just have to say no ;) Or is that drugs? I get the two confused.
"a sexual relationship can be a tricky thing to navigate (no kidding, I mean, esp. when tied up...)"
I loved this part!
With 6 bridesmaids, I hope you are going for a rainbow theme with their dresses! And I hate, hate, hate when I try to run a quick errand to no avail. Why would a pet or fabric store be closed on Monday????
So marriage is easier if you find Jesus? Excuse me...(*cough* LOL!!!LOL!!)
Well, I guess all those Oriental/Buddhist people over there are having more problems with married life then.
I can't say I ever had a dream of eating a cake and being waken up, but as a single girl, I think I can relate and say I know the feeling of frustration about dreams of particularly yummy men.;)
Ham- To his credit, we actually get along really well with our pastor. The other meetings have been great and insightful, it was just this last one when he mentioned we might want to belong to a church community that I felt the need to mention it in the blog. ;-)
Meno- You're my honorary cyber maid-of-honor, woman!
Christie- Counseling wasn't our idea, it was required by our officiant. It hasn't been Earth-shattering, but it's actually been kind of fun and enlightening. And oh yes, I love cake, too.
Mishy- Brilliant idea! Second gift to the fastest girl... I'll have a race at the rehearsal dinner....
Leah- I KNOW! Me too!
Pauline- Thanks. That means a lot coming from someone who writes so beautifully.
Angela- There's no such thing as "too much chocolate"! Silly girl. But yes, counseling is odd. How are your wedding plans coming along?
SS- Heh. Me too. ;-)
Diane- Thanks, I was super frustrated. WHY MONDAYS????
Lily- I know what you mean. Both on the whole non-Christian part of the world-thing, and the yummy-men-dreams-thing. :-)
I think I'd like some chocolate cake. Mmmmmm.
My sis just went through pre-marital counseling and got married in July. She said a lot of it was lame, but they did get some good stuff out of it. Better to do some minor preventative maintenance now and avoid as much as you can down the road!
Post a Comment