Friday, May 23, 2008

My Tiara Is Made of Recycled Cans and Biodegradable Hemp... And Diamonds.

I’ve been more introspective the past couple of days, not sure why. Maybe the wedding pictures pushed the “go crazy” button in my subconscious. The Funasaurus has been working like a madman, and I haven’t seen him in a while. Except to watch the American Idol finale. I know, I know, we are those people. But whatever. We had fun. We totally used it as an excuse to drink the very nice Veuve Clicquot that was just gathering dust in our fridge. Hee! Then we ordered Pizza Hut to ying that yang. We also balance the fine china we got for our wedding on our knees while using paper towels for napkins. People paid good money for me (uh, us) to have pretty dishes, I see no reason not to use them just because I am too lazy to clean off our dinning room table.

So I was saying. I miss my husband, I want to go on another honeymoon. Or at least on another Arrested Development marathon. Awesomest show ever, if you like funny, then you must get yourself a copy of this show. It is a shame, A SHAME, Fox, that it is no longer on TV. It is the funniest thing EVER. How is Are You Smarter than a 5th Grader on and this show's not? No wonder the writers went on strike. You all are morons.

And I’ve been jumpy with every little gust of wind that’s come through here in the past 24 hours, what with the tornados and whatnot just north of here. Reason # 692 to move to the mountains sooner rather than later. I am not a plains girl. Ocean? Sure. Mountains? Sure. Rolling foothills a la Appalachia? It’s my heritage. (Seriously. Grandad was the youngest of seven in the high hills of West Virginia. Yee haw.) But flat stretches of land? Meh. I know some people find it pretty, I get the mythical wheat field-thing some people feel nostalgic for, but it’s not me. At all. And I don’t like wind. Plbthbthbth

Also, it’s astonishing to me the number of people who don’t believe in Global Warming. I had no idea it was such an extremist viewpoint, I kind of thought it was generally accepted, anymore. But apparently not. Best push your head a little deeper in the sand, folks, it’s getting breezy up here in reality what with all the tornados and earthquakes and hurricanes and cyclones and whatnot.

I’m just saying.

And I realize I shouldn’t be too high up on my pedestal, here, seeing as how I still take showers that border on longish. I still sometimes get plastic bags at the grocery store, because it’s what we use to scoop the cat litter into. (Does anyone have an alternative? I really am all-ears. Let me shoot down your first idea by that by saying Sugar turns up her nose at the flushable kind and proceeds to poo on the floor, so that’s a no-go.) And sometimes I leave the light on downstairs because I think my plants like it.

That was actually quite cathartic to admit. Anyone else have some non-greenie confessions? No worries, I still believe you recycle.

8 comments:

Marcia said...

seriously, you've made my day.

I am so glad that you and I have similar feelings / loneliness about our husbands. I haven't seen him in two weeks, and I thought I was going to see him today but he went to a Yankee's game instead!! He told me he wasn't going to go, but I told him to.

But I think he's not going to work for the rest of the weekend. And I get to see him.

Yoga Gal said...

It amazes me how many people don't believe in Gobal Warming! What can you do? Yesterday a guy at a StarBucks told me that scientists have proven that there is no Gobal Warming and I told him that there were scientists that stated that the world was flat and the sun went around the sun! We'er still in the Dark Ages.

rebekah said...

Work schmerk is what I say. :) Where would you go if you could plan another vacation? Costa Rica would be my choice.

cara said...

Today I threw out a pile of stuff that could have been recycled because the amount of stuff in our house was giving me a nervous breakdown and the recycling place is a 20 minute walk away. I don't always remember to take a bag with me to shops so sometimes I take a plastic one too. I fell guilty about throwing them out though so there are dozens of them under the sink - leading to the aforementioned 'stuff' related nervous breakdown. Maybe we should get a cat?

You're right, it is cathartic!

Pauline said...

I've been working (and working after work) and attending graduations and minding the grandkids so I'm a tad behind on blogging and blog reading - but since I've been reading here I've been in stitches over your adventures and your descriptions and your mind-wanderings. Why are you not writing for a living?

Put the kitty litter in recycled paper bags... or better yet, move to the mountains and let the kitties out!

Lily said...

I was going to push the flushable-pine-sented stuff I use for my cats...but I see you already tried that.
My cats love it, and they are difficult...maybe if you gradually make the switch?
I'm so glad I dont have to deal with those stinky little bags full of poo.
It's still recycling though... if you think about it...you use your grocery bags a second time that way.
I own fabric bags, but I still need the plastic ones from time to time, I use them as garbage bags for my kitchen bin...and I think it's better then buying new ones that are made for that purpose...

Celia said...

I'm super late commenting on this post but I have to say AMEN.
#1 to Arrested Development. Funniest show ever and FOX is crazy to have taken off.
#2 to litter in plastic bags. I tried paper bags but they just rotted in the garbage can and made the trash guys angry with me. I'll have to try the flushable but doesn't that just waste water?

Alexa Johnson said...

Thanks for the true confessions. I still get plastic A LOT for disposing of diapers (there--two sins in one!), but I like to go with the re-using rationalization. But my worst sin is that I hate, hate, HATE the light from CFLs. I use them outdoors for the porch lights, but just can not bear them inside. I try to make up for my bad behaviour by being fanatical about everything else, but I do have a lot of green-guilt over it.