Tuesday, August 21, 2007

Who Could Ask for Anything Moooooooooore

Last night I went to take a dance class with my dad. Some time ago (when I was drunk, probably) I decided that it'd be cute if, for the father/daughter dance, we actually waltzed, instead of just swaying back and forth. Dad used to waltz with me standing on his feet in the front hall of our house where I grew up, and I have many fond memories of DUM da da DUM da da-ing across our horrid, orange shag carpet.

So we're recreating the moment, minus the carpeting. And minus me stepping on his feet... at least, intentionally. We both know the basic steps to waltz, what with my mom being an actual dancer and forcing my father to learn, and me having the unfortunate experience of a handful of ballroom classes in college before the teacher laughed my rhythmically-challenged ass right out of the studio. But we decided to take a lesson, just to refresh our memories, and practice dancing together before the Big Day.

The problem is that my father is 100% tone deaf. He does not really understand the concept of a beat. And I inherited the musically inept gene from him, so I am also 100% tone deaf, which horrifies my ballerina mother no end. Puting us together to find a beat is kind of like trying to get a quiet melody out of a herd of stampeding buffalo.

So mom tagged along to our lesson, I guess because she likes inflicting pain upon herself, and the teacher put some music on and asked my dad and I just to try it out, and as we started dancing I saw both her and my mother's jaw drop out of the side of my twirling head.

“It's fascinating...” I heard the teacher whisper. “They are doing the steps perfectly, a little stiff, but very coordinated, yet completely to a different rhythm than the music that's playing.”

Apparently we'd switch it up, sometimes ahead of the music, sometimes behind, my father and I, blissfully unaware. So for the next twenty minutes, we did not get to dance, but instead were made to on the floor with our eyes closed, being told to tap out the rhythm of the music with our hands. Thus bringing on the flood of memories of grade school music class. AKA my first comprehension of my own private hell.

The dancing part was much more fun. If we paired off, my dad with my mother and me with the instructor, we did just fine. I can follow a lead. But the second dad and I got back together, well, we smite the names Ginger Roger and Fred Astaire.

It's like the Muppets were a metaphor for my father/daughter dance.


Christie said...

I'm sure you'll do fine, and if not, who cares; it's your damn wedding and your damn dance! At least you'll be in tune with each other.

Diane said...

I agree with Christie, and I think it's neat you're taking the class with your dad!

Angela said...

Oh my gosh, that is so gosh darn adorable to imagine! I'm sure you guys will be GREAT at the wedding and those classes will be something that you always remember. (No matter how hard you try to forget--hee!)

Kanigget said...

Hilarious! And fantastic! The instructor's comment may just be the greatest thing I've heard all day.

meno said...

That really is cute. I can't dance at all. At least you are trying.

hamiam said...

Heehee....that's awesome, and really sweet :)

v said...

If Fozzie Bear isn't the definition of cool, then nothing is.

PS - Even if you two are off rhythm, which you won't be, I doubt anyone will notice thanks to the adorable/cuteness factor.

M-M-M-Mishy said...

It has been scientifically proven that rhythm and alcohol consumption are directly related. You and your pops should just do some shots before the big dance. Bonus: Everyone loves a drunken bride!

Ryan said...

When in doubt, go with the RUnning man.

Mama P said...

what a great idea. You must query that for a bridal magazine - a new take on the dance practice that brides and grooms always do.

Princess in Galoshes said...

Christine- That's RIGHT! It's my wedding, and I'll dance off-key if I want to.

Diane- Thanks. I was actually surprised by how many people responded to this post with nice comments. I didn't realize it was so rare!

Angela- It's less adorable if you actually see us. How is wedding planning going for YOU?

Kanigget- You'd have laughed even harder had you actually witnessed the madness. Perhaps I will YouTube it, next time. Hmmmm.

Meno- Sadly, I cannot dance, either. I don't know what I was thinking.

Ham- Thanks. :-) I didn't think of it as anything special, but all your comments are making me all schmoopy.

V- You are a wise man. I am a Fonzie afficianado, as well.

Mishy- Oh, do not fear. Pops and I shall be SLOSHED by the time the dance rolls around. Which, as an added bonus, is good for numbing the pain in my feet, too.


Mama P- I had never thought of that. I always just assumed the people in those were people who had a budget approximately 40 times the size of a real persons. But interesting thought.....

audrey said...

That's so funny. Tim can't hear the beat in music, either. We took dance lessons before our wedding, and we learned a few steps but unless he let me lead, we were completely off the beat. At our wedding I let him lead and it was so much fun! We started kinda on the beat, then we sped up, and slowed down, and it probably looked funny but we were in love and newlywed and didn't give a damn. I wouldn't go back and change it for anything.