Monkeys and Owls and Merlot, Oh My!

Last night I met a good friend and former (eeee! Former!) co-worker for drinks and some Christmas shopping. You may remember Shooting Star from previous posts. She’s a very good wine-drinking buddy, which works out very well for me. Especially when, after we’ve consumed large glasses of merlot and various appetizers, she’s all, “No, I insist, it’s my turn to pick up the check!”

And I’m all, “No, no, I’ll get it… uh… wait… I seem to not have a wallet. …So. Um. Ha. Eh. Sure. Why don’t you go ahead and get it? Also: I’m an asshole. Thanks.”

Less shopping was done than I anticipated, seeing as how I had no access to the money I don’t have (hi, Mr. Discovercard, thecardthatpaysyouback, mwwwahh, love you! Kisses!) and that was probably for the best.

But I was deeply saddened when I realized that there are sock monkey Christmas ornaments! I had a cousin who was a little over-attached to his sock monkeys (and there were several, seeing as how sock monkeys could only handle so many weeks of preschool and kicking dirt before they wore out) as a child, so now of course I see fit to incorporate sock monkeys into pretty much every communication I have with him. Especially since he is a big Senior In College, now, and Takes Himself Very Seriously. (HA! Sock monkey Christmas ornament headed your way, m’dear! Probably in an envelope labeled in big letters,“STD results! Handle with care!” because I am funny like that.)

AND! I also found some owl earrings for $10. TEN DOLLARS. I desperately loved them. And could not buy them. So between the sock monkey Christmas ornament and the owl earrings, I spent a very fitful night tossing and turning and angsting over whether someone had snatched them up in the fourteen minutes between when I left the store and when the store closed.

So I bounded (mmm. Bounded might be a slight exaggeration. “Slowly, groaning and whining while forcing my weary body upright at the ungodly hour of 7:15 a.m.” might be more applicable) out of bed with The Funasaurus this morning, and headed back to the mall... this time, with a wallet in tow.

Do you SEE why it was worth it? Do you not love them, too? And. They were only $10. I rarely love things that are on sale. But oh! And I know I am really not supposed to be buying myself stuff… what with not having an income and whatnot… but they were SO CUTE. And only $10. Did I mention that, already?

O.K., so I have them. And now I am off to mail a sock monkey Christmas ornament to an unsuspecting cousin. Tee hee!